Queer diary

Added: Agatha Grieve - Date: 08.09.2021 07:12 - Views: 12000 - Clicks: 728

Blank s are seductive. They are like the settings of dreams: colored by deep questions and desires. Diaries and journals present a nonjudgemental habitat for thoughts and feelings. They are beneficial for people of all ages. And they are mostly meant to be private. This dynamic makes diary-keeping dangerous.

For those of us with an excess of secrets, it can turn the diary into a second limb. A diary is special because of the space it opens for questioning and experimentation.

It is the written articulation of what you do when no one is watching. Many children turn to writing when they feel alienated, and for this reason the diary is often one of the first spaces for coming out. His particular experience of life as a gay trans man echoes through all he writes. He tenderly queer diary the ways he was different from those around him while still craving at times to be accepted as the gay man he was; he loved himself for being trans but he worried other gay men would misunderstand and reject him.

The intricate emotions he felt in both illness and health illuminate the many sides of queer lived reality. Sullivan knew sharing his story would benefit other trans people; for this reason he intended for his diaries to be published before his death from AIDS-related complications inwhen he was just Many queer diarists, especially those of earlier generations, never dreamed that their diaries would be published.

Anne Lister kept diaries in a code derived from Ancient Greek where she catalogued her life and many love affairs with women. She rarely went a day without writing about the places she had been, what she was learning in her studies, and what emotions were occupying her. The code Lister used emerged for protection and because she lacked a specific vocabulary for what she was experiencing.

Lister was born in Halifax, West Yorkshire, England, before the term lesbian had even been coined, in She was wealthy and able to spend much of her leisure time traveling, studying, falling in love, and composing her diaries. M— and I had parted tolerably but the sight of my room was melancholy. It is often the work of loving fans or family members that le to the project of transcribing, editing, and publishing a diary. Occasionally, though, there are people who choose to make the inner workings queer diary their life public. Unlike many other diarists, Mary MacLane was responsible for the publication of her own story.

At the time she was 19 years old and living in Butte, Montana. The diary begins. I of womankind and of nineteen years, will now begin to set down as full and frank a Portrayal as Queer diary am able of myself, Mary MacLane, for whom the world contains not a parallel. I am convinced of this, for I am odd. I am distinctly original innately and in development.

I have in me a quite unusual intensity. MacLane felt alienated in early 20th century Montana. With no frame of reference for her emotions, she recorded her life in what became an early feminist literary phenomenon. She wrote of the intense emotions she experienced from seeing the horror in the world around her.

She went through life with the feeling that other people were going through the prescribed motions of some code that was not made for her. May I never, I say, queer diary that abnormal merciless animal, that deformed monstrosity — a virtuous woman. MacLane died of unknown causes at the age of 48, once she had faded into obscurity. It is my inner life shown in its nakedness. Diaries reflect life. There is not necessarily any fictional character or allegory that is gestured toward in a diary as there would be in a novel.

They unfold as life does, often unexpectedly; they reflect growth, and once a person dies, they end. Growing up queer we are sometimes led to believe that every moment in our lives will be defined by our queerness.

Reading the thoughts queer diary reflections of other queer people gives new context to queer experiences. The in between moments of list-making and daily reflection are as poignant as the details of desire and romantic sagas. Diaries show the importance of everything that is lived: from existential questions to the little dramas of life. It is important to note all the experiences which are not reflected by published queer diaries. A majority of the diaries I was able to uncover are by white authors. Though of course there have been innumerable diaries penned by people from intersecting marginal identities, the diaries that have been published represent only a fraction of the queer experience.

We have to remember that something like queer history does not progress linearly. There are still so many stories to discover that lie hidden in the past.

A of those stories have luckily been popping up in popular culture, books, and media more often in the past few decades, but we should continue to seek out a wider array of experiences as part of our collective queer education. The histories of marginalized groups are boundless, which is to say that history is boundless.

It only takes the interest of one person to spark the opening of a new world which was ly hidden. We can only hope that with time the diaries of more people will be discovered which are currently lost beneath the weight of history. Keith Haring — Keith Haring Journals. Audre Lorde — The Cancer Journals. Joe Orton- The Orton Diaries. David Sedaris — Theft by Finding. About: Nadia Niva. Nadia Niva is a senior at Mount Holyoke College, where she studies the relationship between artmaking and counternarratives of history. She cares most about writing poems, reading books, and having long conversations with as many people as possible.

Oh, women, women! I am always taken up with some girl or other. When shall I amend? The diary begins, I of womankind and of nineteen years, will now begin to set down as full and frank a Portrayal as I am able of myself, Mary MacLane, for whom the world contains not a parallel. Queer diary Nadia Niva Nadia Niva is a senior at Mount Holyoke College, where she studies the relationship between artmaking and counternarratives of history.

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Queer diary

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